Blog: Living in Paradox

Ken Rosen is a therapist and meditation specialist in Florida. He will be sharing his experience as an MPN patient using meditation to cope with his illnesses at the Nashville Patient/Caregiver program April 27.

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Blog Intro
Living in Paradox

 

 

A Sharp Bounce to the Left

If we think about why people like to watch college and professional sports, a couple reasons come quickly to mind: we like the competition, particularly if we are watching the home team; and we like to watch and argue about the strategic choices coaches make throughout the game.

But I believe a big reason, that is not always conscious, is watching a player successfully make a seemingly impossible play. For example, when a baseball player is running to catch a ball in the outfield, and it takes a sharp bounce to the left, (to the fielder's bare hand), and, with an impossible twist of the body, the player is able to make the catch. This play is replayed over and over and discussed long after the game is over. We are fascinated with the ability to adjust to sharp changes, in baseball and in life.

I have myelofibrosis (MF) and for about two years my hemoglobin levels have been excellent (surprising to my doctor). I have attributed my "success" to the medications I take and to a vegetarian and meditative lifestyle. 

About a year ago I began to develop more than a normal amount of skin cancers, squamous cell, and my dermatologist asked if I had gone thru chemotherapy. I have not, but I am on a chemo drug (Jakifi – Ruxolitinib) for my MF. After some quick research he found a study linking aggressive squamous cell growth to the drug. A sharp bounce to the left.

A few days later I had an in-depth discussion with my hematologist/oncologist, who knew nothing of this supposed link. He showed me the printout of the published drug information that did not list any skin cancers as side effects. He committed to doing more research and we agreed that I would stop taking the medication and closely monitor my condition.

Then I left the office and I once again remembered: I am the one on the field, the ball is coming my way, it is a sharp bounce to the left, and it is my play to make. Do I give up? Do I persevere over my bad luck? Do I allow a depression to take over? Not if I choose to be an “athlete of well-being.” I have a great team – but it is my play to make!

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